Classified Ads

Courtesy of Prentiss F.

THESE ARE ACTUAL NEWSPAPER ADS:

• FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.
• FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.
• FREE PUPPIES... Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog.
• FREE GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German.
• FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat .. been out a while..better be a reward.
• NORDIC TRACK $300 Hardly used, call Chubby.
• GEORGIA PEACHES, California grown - 89 cents lb.
• JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300.
• WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. WORN ONCE BY MISTAKE. Call Stephanie.

(AND THE BEST ONE)...

• FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, got married last month, wife knows everything.

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