Stories/Jokes: Battle of the Sexes

The Math of Life

  • Smart man + smart woman = romance
  • Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy
  • Dumb man + smart woman = affair
  • Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage
  • A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
  • A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.
  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
  • To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
  • To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
  • Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
  • Any married man should forget his mistakes, there is no use in two people remembering the same thing.
  • Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
  • Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
  • A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
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