Old Man at the Movie
Courtesy of Prentiss F.
An old farmer went to town to see a movie. The Ticket Agent asked, 'Sir, What's that on your shoulder?'
The old farmer said, 'That's my pet rooster Chuck. Wherever I go, Chuck goes.'
'I'm sorry Sir, ' said the Ticket Agent. 'We can't allow animals in the theater.'
The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed the bird down his overalls. Then he returned to the booth, bought a ticket, and entered the theater. He sat down next to two old widows named Mildred and Marge.
The movie started and the rooster began to squirm. The old farmer unbuttoned his fly so Chuck could stick his head out and watch the movie.
'Marge,' whispered Mildred.
'What?' said Marge.
'I think the guy next to me is a pervert.'
'What makes you think so?' asked Marge.
'He undid his pants and he has his thing out.' whispered Mildred.
'Well, don't worry about it,' said Marge. 'Hell, at our age we've seen 'em all'.
'I thought so too,' said Mildred, 'but this one's eatin my popcorn.'