Courtesy of David R.
A young cowboy from Miles City, Montana goes off to college, but half way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered all his money.
He calls home. "Dad," he says, "You won't believe what modern education is developing! They actually have a program here in Bozeman that will teach our dog, Ole Blue, how to talk!"
"That's amazing," his dad says. "How do I get Old Blue in that program?"
"Just send him down here with $1,000 the young cowboy says. "I'll get him into the course." So, his father sends the dog and $1,000. About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home.
"So how's Ole Blue doing, son," his father asks.
"Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't believe this - they've had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to Read!"
"Read!" says his father, "No kidding! How do we get Old Blue in that program?"
"Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class." The money promptly arrives.
Our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk, nor read.
When he arrives home, his father is all excited.
"Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him read something and talk!"
"Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ole Blue was in the living room kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he usually does.
Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead who lives in town?' The father exclaims, "I hope you SHOT that son of a bitch before he talks to your Mother!"
"I sure did, Dad!"
"That's my boy!"
The kid went on to be a successful lawyer.