When his son refused to get a job, his father insisted he join the Army.

At the induction physical, the medical doctor directed the reluctant recruit to read the eye chart across the room.

What chart doc?' the young man asked.

'The one on the wall!' The doctor said.

'What wall?'

Sensing he had a deadbeat on his hands, the doctor asked his beautiful nurse to strip and walk in naked.

'What do you see now son?'

'Doc, I can't see a thing, I'm blind as a bat.'

'Well, you may not see anything,' the doctor said,'but your dick is pointing straight toward Fort Jackson.'

'Pack your bags and welcome to the U.S. Army my boy.'