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Stories/Jokes: Battle of the Sexes

Definitions According to Gender


1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
female: Any part under a car's hood.
male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
male: Playing football without a jockstrap.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with the boys.

4. BUTT (but) n.
female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes "look bigger."
male: What you slap when someone's scored a touchdown, home run or goal. Also good for mooning.

5. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
female: A desire to get married.
male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

6. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
female: A good movie, concert, play or book.
male: Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

7. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
female: An embarrassing by-product of digestion.
male: An endless source of entertainment, self-statement and male bonding.

8. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) v.
female: The greatest statement of intimacy a couple can achieve.
male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

9. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
male: A device for scanning through all 175 channels every 2-1/2 minutes.


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