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Stories/Jokes: Miscellaneous

The Economy is Sooooo Bad.....


  • The economy is so bad that African television stations are showing 'Sponsor an American Child' commercials!
  • The economy is so bad, a picture is now only worth 200 words.
  • The economy is so bad, Snoop Dogg had to start eating regular brownies.
  • The economy is so bad, I saw the CEO of Wal-Mart shopping at Wal-Mart.
  • The economy is so bad, I went to my bank the other day and the teller handed me a note saying, "This is a robbery!"
  • The economy is so bad, my ATM gave me an IOU!
  • The economy is so bad that the highest-paying job in town is jury duty.
  • The economy is so bad I saw a man in Costco buying one roll of toilet paper.
  • The economy is so bad, the Lone Ranger sold his silver bullets on eBay.
  • The economy is so bad that 7 of 10 houses on Sesame Street are in foreclosure.
  • The economy is so bad, that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
  • The economy is so bad, that when I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
  • The economy is so bad, that CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
  • The economy is so bad, if the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
  • The economy is so bad, Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.
  • The economy is so bad, parents in Beverly Hills have fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
  • The economy is so bad, a truckload of Americans were caught sneaking into Mexico.
  • The economy is so bad, Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
  • The economy is so bad, people in Africa are donating money to Americans.
  • The economy is so bad, Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.

And a few suggestions from site visitors:

  • I can't afford to pay attention. (R.C. Drake)
  • The Obamas are now taking the same plane when they go on vacation. (Recluse)
  • 'Continental Breakfast' is now an olive and a grape. (Spinner)
  • Welfare recipients are the new middle class. (Recluse)
  • Goodwill coupons are taxed as job perks. (Spinner)
  • County morgues are now doubling as butcher shops. (Recluse)
  • Global Warming ended because the world can't afford the heating bill. (Recluse)
  • Al Gore is worthless. Again. (Recluse)
  • Native Americans bought back Manhattan Island using the beads they originally sold it for.
  • My two cents worth is now going for a dime. (R.C. Drake)
  • The economy is so bad that Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America. (Princess Skywalker)
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