Courtesy of Prentiss F.
Two aliens landed in the New Mexico desert near a
gas station that had been
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas
pumps and the younger
of the two aliens addressed it. "Greetings,
Earthling. We come in peace.
Take us to your leader."
The gas pump (of course) didn't respond. The
younger alien started to get
mad at the lack of response and the older one said,
"I wouldn't do that if
I were you."
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated
Again, there was no response. Annoyed by what he
perceived to be the
pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and
"Greetings Earthling. We come in peace. Do not
ignore us in this way! Take
us to your leader, or I will fire."
The older alien again warned his comrade, "You
don't want to do that. You
really don't want to make him mad!"
"Rubbish," replied the younger alien. He aimed his
weapon at the pump and
fired. There was a huge explosion. A massive
fireball roared outwards and
towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet
and deposited him in a
burnt and crumpled mess 200 yards away in a cactus
Thirty Earth minutes later, when he finally
refocused his three eyes and straightened his bent
antenna, he looked
dazedly up at the wiser one, who was standing over
him, slowly shaking his
big green head.
"What a ferocious creature," said the young fried
one. "It damn near
killed us! How did you know it was so dangerous?"
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly
feeler onto his crispy,
peeling flesh and shared some knowledge. "If there's
one thing I've learned
during my travels through the galaxy," said the wise
old alien, "When a guy
has a pecker he can wrap around himself twice and
then stick it in his ear,
usually, you don't mess with him."