Stories/Jokes: Battle of the Sexes

Why Men Can't Win

Courtesy of David R.

  • If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
  • If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
  • If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
  • If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your rear and find something better.
  • If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
  • If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
  • If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
  • If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
  • If you cry, you're a wimp.
  • If you don't, you're insensitive.
  • If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist pig.
  • If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
  • If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
  • If she asks you, it's a favor.
  • If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
  • If you don't, you're a slob.
  • If you buy her flowers, you're after something.
  • If you don't, you're not thoughtful.
  • If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.
  • If you're not, you're not ambitious.
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