Stories/Jokes: Regional Humor

Redneck Jedi

Courtesy of Nancy A.


1. You ever use the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

2. Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

3. You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of Beer.

4. At least one wing of your X-Wings is primer colored.

5. You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

6. You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

7. The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

8. Wookies are offended by your B.O.

9. You have ever used the force to get yourself another Beer so you didn't miss a NASCAR interview with any of the Allisons.

10. You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/hunting/bowling.

11. Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son, come on over to the dark side ... it'll be a hoot."

12. You have ever had your R-2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

13. You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

14. You ever fantasized about Princess Leia wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

15. You have the doors of your X-Wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

16. Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

17. You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

18. You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

19. If when addressing the Jedi Council you use "Bubba" for more than half of them.

20. If you hear: "Luke, I am your father ... and your uncle."

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