Stories/Jokes: Drinking Stories

Great Barroom Signs

Courtesy of Gregory G.

Friends don't let friends 
 Take home ugly men

-Women's restroom,
Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Beauty is only a light switch away
-Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, NC

If life is a waste of time, 
 and time is a waste of life, 
then let's all get wasted together
 and have the time of our lives.

-Armand's Pizza, Washington, DC

Fighting for peace is like 
 screwing for virginity

-The Bayou, Baton Rouge, LA

No matter how good she looks, 
 some other guy is sick and tired 
 of putting up with her shit.

-Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill
Chapel Hill, NC

At the feast of ego 
 everyone leaves hungry

-Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea
Tucson, AZ

It's hard to make a comeback 
 when you haven't been anywhere.

-Written in the dust on the back of a bus
Wickenburg, AZ

Make love, not war 
 Hell, do both 

-Women's restroom
The Filling Station
Bozeman, MT

If voting could really change things, 
 it would be illegal.

-Revolution Books, New York, New York

If pro is opposite of con, 
 then what is the opposite of progress? 

-Men's restroom, House of Representatives
Washington, DC

Express Lane: 
 Five beers or less

-Sign over one of the urinals
Ed Debevic's, Phoenix , AZ

You're too good for him 
Sign over mirror in Women's restroom
Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

No wonder you always go home alone 
-Sign over mirror in Men's restroom
Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

~~~ and perhaps the most realistic one ~~~

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: 
 If it has tires or testicles, 
 you're going to have trouble with it 

-Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, TX

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