Humor Etc

April 29, 2005

I've added some webcams as additional attractions for your viewing pleasure. They're sometimes fun to watch and can be quite entertaining if there's a lot of activity. The Bourbon Street cam can be switched to streaming video on Friday and Saturday nights when it goes "live" with sound. It features Hillary, a good looking blonde host, who frequently complains about getting her ass grabbed. Her cameraman likes to zoom in on good looking women passing by, or parts thereof. If only the picture quality was better.

Starting to get a few picture submittals. The current one on the homepage is really great. I bet the cops in Harrah, OK. really take a ribbing over that one. Thanks Ken and Camille. Please keep them coming.

In news of the weird, there's been a epidemic of exploding toads over in Germany and Denmark. For the more gruesome details check out the article.

April 21, 2005

Put up some "Ads by Google" today. They tailor the ads to the page that they're placed on. Nothing noteworthy there until I checked their ads on the Pets and other Critters Page. The bottom ad was for Bird Diaper Flightsuits. Who'd a thought??? Bet they're a bitch to put on.

In other news, the Department of Defense is testing a new system to warn idiot pilots that they are entering restricted airspace over Washington D.C., and could be on the recieving end of a Sidewinder missle if they don't remove themselves. This involves the use of a low intensity, wide beam, non-eyeball frying laser which flashes red and green (Merry Christmas!!) on the intruding airplane. Wouldn't one of these gadgets be great to carry in the car to "signal" other drivers instead of using hand gestures?

April 18, 2005

The past few days I've been doing some "damage control", or debugging as the computer geeks professionals call it, on some of my earlier web pages produced before my current high degree of HTML understanding (lol). I also added some new stories. While taking breaks from these endeavors I discovered some really neat websites:

snopes.com This website investigates those email mill rumors such as: *77 on your cell phone, Starbucks not sending GIs coffee, Glade plug-ins fire hazard, etcetera. Check out their "Hottest 25 Legends".

savethis This free site saves all of your bookmarks on their server. In other words if your computer crashes, has to be restored, or simply "vanishes", you'll still have all your bookmarks without having to try and remember where all those sites were. Also has some other "bells and whistles".

Gmail This is a new free email service that Google is currently testing. Offers over 2 gigabytes storage and various other features not currently standard with other email accounts. Can't sign up for it yet but looks like it will be worth a test drive.

April 12, 2005

I noticed in a new poll today on airline travel that one of passengers' biggest beefs (58%) was people with too much carry on luggage. After my last trip over Thanksgiving I completely agree. I began to wonder if I was flying with a planeload of "Beverly Hillbillies". It seemed to take forever for these folks to store all their worldly possessions in the overhead compartments. To make matters worse, Delta, at least at that time, boarded the plane starting from the front first. That makes about as much sense as a screen door in submarine. It was so bad that boarding the plane actually took longer that going through security. And getting off the plane seemed even worse. I think the airlines could get out of their current financial difficulties simply by charging extra for carry on luggage. There's a goldmine there.

4/9/2005

CALIFORNIA DREAMIN'

While making a trash run yesterday I noticed that the neighbors had tossed out an empty bed-frame box. The box labeling stated that the frame fit all sizes including "California King". Having never before heard of this designation my imagination ran wild, what with all the California rules, regulations and warnings in existence (next time you cook out check out the charcoal bag). Trying to think like a California bureaucrat I pictured the mattress tag reading something like this:

1.) No animals were used or mistreated during the manufacture or transportation of this product.

2.) Not constructed of any materials known by The State of California to be harmful to the quality of life. See State of California Harmful Substances Act, sub-section 25,896,243 (mattresses). This act can be downloaded from our website. Download size: 113 gigabytes.

3.) Flame retardant, however it is unlawful to use tobacco products within 100 feet of this product.

4.) Can be used as a flotation device.

5.) Will absorb impact of falling debris up to 20 PSI.

6.) Removal of this tag will result in Termination.

April 7, 2005

Finally got the photo submittals guidelines up along with some samples. There's a lot of good stuff out there if you just look for it.

When I was growing up, I recall a house out in the country which had three mailboxes. One, on top of a twenty foot high pole, labeled "Air Mail". Next to the pole was a large metal garbage can labeled "Bills". And the last mailbox, a regular one, labeled "regular mail". Humor can also appear in places you'd least expect it. After a tornado in Oklahoma City, someone spray painted on the last remaining wall of their home "For Rent - Cheap". Some folks even take it to the grave via their tombstone.

These are some of the things that I'd like to have photos of. A lot of people go out their way to share their sense of humor with the rest of the world and I'd like to help them along. You can even get your name, and/or theirs "In Font" in the process.

Nothing can turn a bad day around faster than a good laugh.

April 4, 2005

Many thanks to the folks at roadsideamerica.com for allowing me "borrow" the racecar tombstone photo. Suggest you check them out before your next road trip. They feature many offbeat tourist attractions that you might otherwise miss or might not stop at because they appear to be an optical illusion.

April 2, 2005

I haven't forgotten about the submittal guidelines. Developed "technical difficulties" after posting the Windows satire "The Borg Meet Microsoft". Surely just a coincidence.

After getting the technical problems solved, I decided to go off the deep end and put up the "Murphy's Law Revisited" photos. If you'll look closely, the last photo is a fake. Even Murphy's not that good. Compare the background in it with the 5th photo and those in between.

In the meantime, I'm back to working on the submittal procedure.